Going through the motions

Thank you, Juli, for posting this on my Facebook wall   :-)

After my blog on Saturday, I spent the day scrapping with friends.  Lots of smiles, laughs... and food.  Even after I blogged about my frustrations with my weigh loss (or lack there of) and my attitude in general, I still was not ready to get back to it.  

When I got home from the scrapbook crop, I was feeling a bit full (pizza and snacks will do that), so I held off on having dinner until I was truly hungry.  The first time I had done that in several weeks.  That was a step in the right direction.

On Sunday, I thought about ways I could motivate myself.  Something that would be incentive to have a good day.  I decided on the "carrot in front the horse" approach.  Rewarding myself with food was definitely out, but what else was there?  Well, the day before I found out the the website that I use to order digital scrapbooking kits will discontinue their digital sales at the end of April.  I have a bunch of kits on my wish list.  I decided that for every good day (meaning I have tracked, workout out, and met my step goal), I could buy a kit off my wish list.  

Usually this kind of incentive doesn't always work for me, but since I only have a month to pick and choose from my wish list, it seems to be working.  Well, at least it has for the last four days.

I don't feel as though I've made any type of mental shift.  I still don't feel gung-ho to get back into weight loss routine nor have I had the "click" that happens when losing weight feels almost easy, natural.  Nope.  None of that.  I'm just a horse trying to reach the carrot.  I'm just going through the motions.  Doing the things I must do in order to stay on track and lose weight.

The other thing that happened on Sunday, was a beautiful text message from my friend Mary.  She read my blog, then took the time to text me about the Saturday morning Weight Watcher meeting (the one I didn't go to because I was feeling sorry for myself).  It was a great reminder about why I have continued with Weight Watchers all these years.  And why I have continued to go to the meetings the last couple of years, even when I wasn't following their food plan.  I go for the people.  The people that have touched my life (like Mary, Kathryn, Windy, Kay, Sandy, Bobbie, Barb, Linda, and many more) and to possibly touch the lives of those who attend the meetings.  The meetings are a give and take, in way that is both subtle and extreme.  

Which means, thanks to Mary, I will be going to the Weight Watcher meeting tomorrow.  I will be facing the scale and staying for the meeting.  I need the WW meetings, as much as the meeting needs me.  

Some successes this week as I go through the motions of getting back on track:

• I have meet (and surpassed) my daily step goal of 10,500
• Yesterday, while at the Mexican restaurant for lunch, I did not have any chips and salsa (first time ever I have not indulged in the pre-meal chips and salsa), and made a healthy choice on the entree (thanks for the suggestion, Sibyl!)
• I did not take a cookie when offered it to me...several times... yesterday (Girl Scouts Samoa cookie, my favorite!!)
• I did not eat any of the homemade brownies brought into our office
• I have worked out or ran the last four mornings.

So regardless of what the number on the scale tomorrow, I will keep these things in mind.  They are a measure of my true success!